What is Blocking our Dream?

The Master has been saying it for years, but it feels like only now I'm taking that instruction and sadhana for real. Set an intention. What has to happen — not how it's supposed to happen. Then see everything inside oneself that is blocking it.

The intention became concrete: ten thousand people are going to complete the Nirvan Method. Be naked to your intention. Purify it. And see all the things that are not allowing it.

Creation happens in the upward flow. Without connection to the upward flow, one cannot create. And the blocks one carries can only be exposed, and purified, in that same upward flow? If the water is not flowing, how can one reveal the block? If the water is still, the block won't be seen.

Sitting alone on the farm today, the attempt was to hold the intention, stay connected to that flow, sit in the possibility, and then see.

The first thing that came up: I don't want to do the work. A laziness. Remembering what the Master said about privilege, thinking everything is going to be served without effort.

But sitting longer, that wasn't the deeper block. The resistance remained. Not enough energy. Why?

And then something deeper came. Oh my god. I'm a loser. I will be a loser no matter what. Even if ten thousand people complete the Nirvan Method, I'll still be a loser. So why bother?

A child who feels always in the shadow of a glorified father?

Sitting with that identity, a rage emerged.

One block is exposed. And I wonder, what more blocks are in the way for this wonderful creation to happen?