Pain as a doorway out of the reduced state?

”Begin with facing the pain of making it all about yourself,” the Guru said.

The pain of making it all about me must be known well and met and stayed with and felt. Awareness is born in meeting. Not clinging, not wishing it was not there - which is also clinging.

”This is a sexual primal mechanism,” Master says.
Which means I cannot help it being there. But I can be unreduced by it, but then I must be more than it, and I suppose I can only be more than it if I am aware of all of it - can witness all of it. Otherwise I am still unconscious of parts of it, which means I am … governed by it.

So the pain of it must be known. Maybe I cannot go directly to the More, but I can curiously study the walls that keeps me separated from it?

Where does the Nirvan state come in here?
Perhaps a lower Nirvan state is to study this prison of making it all about myself without clinging to it, because the clinging is like clothing - not naked.

And then something new might open up, where I can begin to study the More that opens up in me by being more than the prison I am studying?